Distinctive

By Victoria Tillson Evans, Ph.D.

October always brings change. While I’m sure all of us are excited about the earthy purple mums decorating front steps around our neighborhoods, the crackling oak leaves beneath our sneakers, and the return of cool mornings inviting us to pull on cozy sweaters, most of us are not prepared for October Angst.

What is October Angst, you ask?

Well, it comes in two forms. In the first, many students and their parents, who have kept their cool for months, if not years, about college admissions, suddenly lose the ability to think clearly about the process. While this is normal, it’s also safe to say that it’s irrational. You’ve been chipping away at the process systematically and you’re on top of everything! It’s thus important to recognize that, if not kept in check, this angst could really throw you into an unnecessary tailspin. Don’t do that to yourself! In the second form, the angst derives from a lack of planning and consistent effort, not only since August 1st, when most application systems opened, but since at least January 1st of junior year, when the application process actually begins for juniors. This angst is also normal, but unlike the first form, it is unfortunately necessary and sadly rational. If you find yourself in this position, you should let your anxiety drive you to lock in and put in the effort to get a lot of work done with the time you’ve got left.  

So how do you recognize October Angst?

You know you’re feeling it, because usually around October 1st, the early deadlines, which once felt so far away, suddenly feel so uncomfortably close. This causes you to wonder if you’re on track, if your essays are strong, if you’ve picked the right schools, if you’re done enough outside of the classroom to stand out. Should you take the SAT again? Should you try the ACT instead? Are your letter writers doing their job? Will your transcripts get to schools in time? Should you apply to your top choice even though 3 other people from your school are also applying? Oh my! 

First of all, take a deep breath in and then let it out. 

I know. There’s a lot to keep track of, and there’s a lot that’s out of your control. So the best you can do is stay the course, focus on what you can control, and trust that everything else will fall into place.

Now, if we’ve been working together, your course has been set for you. We’ve paced your written work and all of the other elements, so that you tackle a little bit at a time. After all, we know all about The Deadline Dash! If we haven’t been working together, Jon Perkins, Phil Sung, and I put together a timeline and application checklist in our book Stairway to College Heaven. If it’s already October, I recommend still getting a copy and condensing the pieces of the process outlined for you into workable chunks that align with the time that you have left.

Regarding focus, the first big area where you have control is essays. This is probably why I usually see so much angst over them in October. Some students begin to question anything and everything that they have written. And rather than move forward with their remaining materials, they stall. Their eyes drift away from what lies ahead, and suddenly their attention turns to what sits behind. They reread and rethink the essays they’ve already finished, and they sometimes rewrite them over and over and over again.

Please don’t do this to yourself. It’s just October Angst!

Instead, trust me when I say that, when a student asks to share a new essay idea with me in October, if the new idea is genuinely better than the original one, I will let the student know and ask them to write the new essay. But in 99% of cases, the new idea is not as good as the original one. Trust what you’ve already written. You’ve spent a lot of time developing your work already. Your old ideas are solid!

The next big area where I see October Angst creep in is the college list. Are there enough likely schools on my list? Can I really get into my early decision choice? Is my early decision choice prestigious enough? Am I applying to enough schools? Am I applying to too many? Many of these doubts stem from conversations that you have with friends, family, or even a random stranger at the coffee shop. Everyone’s input suddenly feels so important. Instead, it’s essential that you block out the noise and trust that you have been thoughtful about this process over the course of the last few years as you explored your options and visited schools. Remember that “The grass is always greener,” is an expression for a reason, but you made your choices thoughtfully! My recommendation is to stop talking about the process with others and keep it personal. You’ll find that your nerves quiet down!

You might now be wondering if there’s anything else you can do to shake this October Angst. 

In my experience, the answer is frequently yes, especially once you’re on the other side of the process. I know, you don’t want to wait that long. So if you’re feeling angsty for a while, give yourself outlets beyond the application process that make you happy! Sitting around at home and ruminating is absolutely the last thing you want to do. Personally, I go for long runs to shake off the stress of application season or read novels to wind down after a long day. You might enjoy baking, playing an instrument, fishing, or trainspotting. Whatever it is that will help you disconnect and refresh your mind, do it!

Above all, have faith in yourself. When you’ve put in the time, thought, effort, and heart to prepare for this process, my hope is that this October Angst that you feel is ultimately just the growing pains that come with discovering what you’re made of.